I don't want more tears in my eyes

It can't be possible.

I CAN'T CRY every time, after talk to you... it isn't ok...

I thought I was fine now... but not... yet...
Why does it still hurting so much? Weeks has happened... and I don't want to feel this anymore... I don't wanna miss you... I don't wanna be cared about you... I don't wanna love you

I never thought I can love you this way... I thought you weren't too important to me... even I thought I have the control of me... of my feeling... though I've always known that's impossible.

Spring... its supposed to be great... it supposed we are together til summer... it SUPPOSED...
I see all that happy couples and I feel sad... really sad... because I miss you a lot.... and I have envey of them because they feel that the other person loves them... something that I lost.

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Sometimes I think... like the song... what is this life for? if you study... doesn't matter.. you will die... if you work... doesn't matter... you'll die... if you love doesn't matter... you'll die... if you feel.. doesn't matter .. you'll die....All what do you do at the end is unuseful, because you die...
But we cannot think of this way... if we do it... nothing would have sense... and everybody would be unhappy...

The human been always need something to life for... I know I have to do a lot of things before die.. but... also I know that all that I do is for nothing... so I wonder if all that we live and all that we feel have any sense... a minimun sense...

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Today.... when we talked.... I almost tell you that I'm still loving you
but I couldn't.... I think that it would be unuseful and without any importance... now